Unsaid

You asked me if I'm happy, I said, "Of course I am." You smiled and pulled me closer... I wish you'd asked again. There's nothing wrong between us, At least that's what I say, We still kiss in the kitchen, Still ask about our day. You still know how I take it, Two sugars in my tea, You know everything about me... Except what's underneath. There's a sentence in my throat I've swallowed every night, 'Cause once I let it leave my lips, I can't make it alright. So I leave it unsaid, Let it live inside my head, Lie beside you in our bed, While I rehearse what I regret. You say, "I love you," I say it too, But lately I don't know If I mean it like I used to. So I hold you instead... And leave the rest unsaid. We talk about December, The places we could go, You show me little houses Like we're supposed to know. I nod at all the right times, Say, "That one looks like us," While something in my stomach Says I'm running out of trust. Not in you, In what I feel for us. There's a truth behind my teeth, And every night it grows, Maybe silence isn't kindness When you're the last to know. So I leave it unsaid, Let it live inside my head, Lie beside you in our bed, While I rehearse what I regret. You say, "I love you," I say it too, But lately I don't know, If I mean it like I used to. So I hold you instead... And leave the rest unsaid. Maybe love doesn't leave With a slammed front door. Maybe nobody cheats, Nobody starts a war. Maybe sometimes it disappears So quietly... You don't know it's gone Until you're pretending It isn't. There's something I need to tell you. ...just not tonight. So I'll leave it unsaid, One more night inside my head, You'll fall asleep against my chest, I'll stare at the ceiling instead. You'll say, "I love you," I'll say it too, And hate myself a little 'Cause you think I still do. Maybe tomorrow I'll tell you the truth... But tonight I'll hold you instead, And leave it... Unsaid. You asked me if I'm happy. I said, "Of course I am." You should've asked again.